THE DUNDEE CAT

THE DUNDEE CAT

by

Watt Nicoll

Fifty years in her wee top flat

The poor old woman and her old tom cat

In an attic room in Dundee town

A poor old woman put the tale around

That she lived all the years in her wee top flat

Nae company but her old tom cat

Fifty years in her wee top flat

The poor old woman and her old tom cat

One night by the fire, she felt gie glum

When what do you think came down the lum?

But her fairy godmother, saying, ‘Have no fear

To grant three wishes they have sent me here’

Fifty years in her wee top flat

The poor old woman and her old tom cat

The woman looked down at her empty purse

‘I could always use some cash, of course’

The fairy then waved her wand around

Till lying on the floor was a thousand pounds

Fifty years in her wee top flat

The poor old woman and her old tom cat

For a lovely figue and a face divine

For tonight I wish these things were mine

Said the fairy godmother, ‘Well, I'll have a go’

She made her look like Biddy Bardot

Fifty years in her wee top flat

The poor old woman and her old tom cat

This beautiful woman, by the fire she sat

She turned her attention to the old tom cat

He's my only love so here's my plan

For tonight make him my handsome man

Fifty years in her wee top flat

The poor old woman and her old tom cat

This handsome man to the lass came near

Whispered softly in her ear

‘The night is young but you'll regret

The day you took me to the vet!’

Fifty years in her wee top flat

The poor old woman and her old tom cat